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Fiction. © Copyright 1996, Jim Loy
Someone entered my apartment, while I was gone, recently. He is male, of low intelligence, has brown hair, is 6-foot-eleven to 7-foot-one, walks with a limp, wears reading glasses, lives in one of the other apartments in this apartment complex, and may still have, in his possession, a white sport sock with blue and gray stripes. No, I didn't see who it was. But my deductions are rather elementary.
The most important clue was a hair that I found on the ceiling of my shower. I am not tall enough to have accidentally left a hair on the ceiling. So, I can deduce an intruder, who took a shower in my apartment. The ceiling is about 7 feet, 4 inches above the surface of the bath tub directly below the hair. There was no evidence of shampoo on the ceiling. So, the intruder was tall, but not quite 7-foot-four. To lose a hair with no shampoo on it, the intruder was probably drying his hair with a towel, and the hair was actually deposited on the ceiling by the towel. That would make him about 6-foot-eleven to 7-foot-one.
The hair was brown and relatively short, only two inches long. So, I deduce a brown-haired man. But, we cannot rule out a short-haired female.
The door shows no evidence of forced entry. But, I sometimes forget to lock my apartment, when I go out.
The only thing missing from my apartment is a single white sports sock, with blue and gray stripes around it. Now, people do not break into apartments to steal one sock and take a shower. So, I can deduce that the intruder entered my apartment by mistake, took a shower, absently picked up a sock, and left. He must have thought it was his own apartment, at least for a while. This means that he lives in one of the other apartments in this apartment complex. And my apartment could only be mistaken for certain other apartments in the complex.
In order to misidentify an apartment number, the intruder probably needs glasses in order to read with. If he wore bifocals, he probably would not have made that mistake. So, I deduce that he uses reading glasses, which he, of course, was not wearing.
My coffee table is placed in a particularly poor place, which makes it virtually impossible to keep from tripping over it when entering the apartment. In particular, a person not familiar with my apartment could not avoid tripping over it. Therefore, I deduce that the intruder walks with a limp. I, myself, walk with a limp.
Now, how could the intruder have failed to realize that he was in the wrong apartment, after tripping over a coffee table which was apparently in the wrong place? I must deduce low intelligence. Which leads me to guess that he may still be carrying my sock.
After all, once you have eliminated everything that is impossible, whatever is left, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.
Postscript: I have not actually seen the intruder, in the neighborhood. That may seem a little strange, as he/she should stand out. But, it is obvious that this person is around here somewhere. And I will eventually see this person, if he/she has not moved away, that is.